If I could offer up one tip that will have a positive impact on your life, it would be an adaptation of what my father told me when I was moving from Chicago to Boston.
I didn’t have any money.
I didn’t have a job lined up in this new city.
I didn’t have a clue what I was doing.
I did however have faith. I had faith in myself and my abilities.
During our drive, my father offered my a piece of advice:
“Son, realize you’re alone on this Earth.”
At first, I couldn’t understand what he meant by this.
Here he was, in my 1999 Pontiac Grand Am coupe, sitting right next to me.
I had him.
I had my family.
I had my friends.
I had acquaintances.
I just couldn’t wrap my head around what he was saying.
He continued his advice with:
“In the wee moments when you wake up in the morning and the precious minutes before you fall into a deep sleep it is only you. You are the only one who will have the dreams in your head. You are the only one that can act on those dreams. You are going to have people around you in your life come and go. You will have people try and help you with those dreams. Some will be there for the long haul- significant other, parents, siblings, children etc. Others will pass after a year or so. All in all it’s your life. Live it how you see fit.”
This was the most liberating feeling I had ever experience.
I was free.
I was free to be me.
I knew exactly what he meant by the dreams in my head.
I wake up in the morning and think about them.
Before I go to sleep I think about them.
I’ve even had dark times in my life with drugs and alcohol and tried to silence those dreams for they felt too heavy.
After hearing these words, my life opened up.
Much of the periphery static-noise began to silence.
I had so many perceived wishes from other people that I put so much emphasis in.
I constantly wanted to make other people happy and I would sacrifice my own happiness in order to do so.
Overtime, in trying to make others happy at my own expense, I lost sight of my dreams and desires and wants and needs.
When I heard that I am alone I began to see my dreams once again.
There’s a saying that has resonated with me as of recent.
I’m paraphrasing but it goes something like:
You must make sure your room is clean before you go out into the world and try to make a difference. One cannot change the world and influence humanity if they have not made their own bed, done their laundry, fed their body a healthy diet and cleared up their mind.
I think that goes in line with what my father told me.
You are alone.
With that comes a GREAT responsibility.
You need to build yourself up before you can help build the rest of the world.
Again you are alone.
You have a responsibility to clean yourself up and be the light to guide others.
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