Life is hard.
Life is full of ups and downs. It can be full of enriching experience that helps us grow as individuals. It is also full of struggle and oppression by the universe that is impartial to our prosperity and overall happiness.
In the short amount of time I have spent on this Earth (28 years and counting) I have experienced my own bouts of prosperity and struggle.
I have spent a night homeless where I had to sleep in a tarp while wedged under the front end of my car.
I have had my place of employment literally burn up in flames.
I have slept on a friend’s floor for 2 months while looking for a job.
I have been cheated on by multiple women.
I have been fired from my job.
There have been many times throughout my life where I found myself without hope and full of despair. It kept looking like I would build realms of my life only to have them swept away in what seemed like an overnight event.
Through it all, however, I can say that I am experiencing a lot of fulfillment and joy in the present.
But that’s just it, isn’t it?
In order to have a fulfilling existence, one must need both struggle and prosperity in order to reach a place of balance and joy.
Think about it.
By definition, can you have good without bad? No, you cannot. Why is that? Well if everything were always good you wouldn’t have the counterpart to compare it to.
I believe the same holds true with fulfillment in life. If everything was always fulfilling, how on Earth would you know? You need things in life that set you back to compare to what you have when things are good.
I find this to be true with the very wealthy and affluent people in my network. The people who were given their wealth and born into it are usually aimless in life. They haven’t needed to struggle for anything. So they are unhappy in their situation. They aren’t on any type of mission. They aren’t out on the hunt. They are directionless in a world with no maps on how to live.
In living a fulfilling life, I think it’s important to ask yourself a handful of questions. These questions are the building blocks to a roadmap you can use to guide you towards your North Star.
1. What excites you?
In those first few moments that you wake up in the morning.
The few minutes before you open the door and are pulled to the whims of the Universe; what gets you going?
Do you love dogs?
Do you like to write?
Do you like to listen to music through state-of-the-art headphones?
Identify what excites you. This is the foundation of building your fulfilling life.
2. What are you afraid of?
Maybe I’m the bearer of bad news here.
Your fears are never going to go away unless you confront them.
The voice in your head that dictates your anxieties is there to stay unless you fight and conquer it. No amount of Xanax or Ambien will silence the fears. Identify what you are afraid of.
Is it your voice not mattering? Is it the fear of abandonment? It is not living up to your fullest potential?
The fears are real. Make sure you know what demon you need to slay before you get to set out on your quest.
3. Where do I want to be?
Be the dreamer.
What do you want your life to look like in x amount of years?
Do you want to be a published writer?
Do you want to be a musician on stage playing for a few thousand people in the audience?
This exercise is to raise the stakes of your life. The truth here: a lot of people try and more people will fail. The vast majority will stay on the sidelines watching, however. The best option, at least to help in your search for fulfillment, is to at least get off the sidelines and try.
4. What do you need to “clear up?”
For the longest time, I was living in limbo and I didn’t even know it. I was living a life in which I thought was moving forward but in fact I was walking in place. My father wanted me to run his business.
I did not.
I took years for me to tell him the truth. I thought I was a failure as a son if I ever did. When the day came, he embraced my dreams. He thought it was great I wanted to do my own thing. This provided me with a “blank canvas” with life to work on. I wasn’t painting his picture- I was painting my own.
5. Who can help you along the way with your journey?
Human beings aren’t created in a vacuum.
We have the amazing civilizations with the incredible technology because we have been able to rely on one another throughout the ages.
This is true in your individual life. You are going to need to enroll people into your journey. Maybe a family member can help with finances. Maybe a friend can help teach a new skill. Maybe that professor will turn into a life-long mentor. Bringing people into your vision can help subdue the feeling of being overwhelmed.
6. What can I control?
At the end of the day, a lot of responsibility falls on you as the individual. There are so many things that can happen to you that the Universe doesn’t care about. You are going to be kicked down.
When you are kicked down, you are going to have salt thrown on the wound. After all that, however, what can you control? The only thing really you can control is your mind and your reaction to everything. Belief is of the utmost importance.
It is necessary to believe in yourself in order to break past the onslaught of struggle and strife the Universe is going to bestow upon you.
You are a force.
When the pressure of life pushes hard on you, push back 10X and become the person you’ve always seen yourself becoming.
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